Even when you and your co-wife have a good relationship there will still be differences. You parent differently, have different mannerisms, interact with your spouse differently, etc… You will not always see eye to eye on every matter. These are things that Im learning to cope with, inshaallah.
Im am very much an independent. Most of the time it’s beneficial, but sometimes my husband would like me to depend on him for certain things. And I’ll be honest, it irritates me a little. My Co, is the opposite and since he’s used to her dependence, he expects me to be more dependent.
I raise my children to be independent and strong-willed. To have their own opinions. Im finding that my co-wife and I have very different parenting styles, and i think sometimes she a bit bothered by it.
Im understanding that a sister in Islam, companion, and co-wife are completely different roles. I think we are learning how to separate them without causing eachother harm.
Sometimes I laugh to myself when she has irritated me and think, “I love this lady…” She is my bestfriend even though we have differences.
Sometimes I feel bad for our husband. He’s on an emotional roller coaster that he’ll never be able to get off of! Lol. My co-wife is coping with having a new-born baby and a co-wife, and Im coping with being in love primarily for the pleasure of Allah for the first time in my life and finally finding my worth, walhamdulillah.
I look in my husband’s eyes sometime and can tell that his thoughts are all over the place. He always worries about us. I wish he’d worry about himself too. I wish he’d do somethings for himself. Inshaallah she and I will be okay. I can’t imagine that it’s easy having two wives who are very different and being the man who loves them….