It has been a while since my last entry. Thanks to some advice from one of my followers, I felt it was best not to blog when Shaytaan is whispering to me. Rather, I should wait until the smoke clears and I’m thinking rationally. Thanks Ukhti ;)
The last few weeks have been… Well lets just say that polygany definitely requires that you fear Allah ta’ala even more than you thought you already did. As you know I told you that we were all sharing one vehicle and walhamdulillah the stress that bought to all of us is beginning to dwindle down. I been getting my butt on the bus and doing a helluva lot of walking! Lol. I consider it to be Allah ta’alas mercy on me. As I ride or walk I get time to reflect. I get time to sight-see without cars beeping at me because I’m drifting into their lane as my mind wonders. I get time to walk with my daughters and hold their hands, to watch them gaze out of the window as I wonder what they are thinking about.
My Co-Wife and I are that… My Co-Wife and I. I think every now and then the women in a polygenous marriage should take a break from eachother. Not because your upset with eachother, but to give your sisterhood and friendship a chance to catch up. You get so caught up in the fact that you share this man and sharing a bond through sisterhood and friendship kind of goes on the back-burner. It’s funny because both of our 8 year-old daughters had to get a break from eachother too! Lol. I am sure it’s a woman thing!
I have been getting a little homesick. I’ve been missing my Nana a lot. I actually had the audacity to ask my husband if I could spend the night at my Nana’s… He said ‘no’, but it was okay cause I ended up calling her on Tango. I don’t know what’s up with my homesickness. I just hope it’s an acute case.
Lately, it’s been feeling like my husband is my husband, but also my father. I feel like I’m getting raised and molded into a better person. A person with a better heart. There are things I thought to be right or true and as of lately, things are happing to cause my husband to take a step back and realize that for me to be a good wife, I have to be a good Muslim. Our Islam is our Islam. My faith won’t be at the level of someone else’s and vise versa. A strong suit he has is that he is good at implementing what he learns, maa shaa’allah, walhamdulillah. Once he learns something he puts it into practice. If he doesn’t understand it fully he leaves it be until he does. He’s not affraid to say, ‘I don’t know.’ He may not be able to tell you about a hadith word for word or exactly what ayah Allah said such-and-such, but if your on a topic he knows exactly what to say from the quran and sunnah to back up what he says. I have always admired that about him, maa shaa’allah. I beg Allah to preserve those qualities in him. Ameen.
Myself on the other hand… I am the memorizer. The learner. One who reads a book in it’s entirety and then reads it again to take notes. The one who can tell you about some of the great scholars of Islaam from their birth to their death but my implementing of the religion needs some work. I’m learning that before I start diving into these advanced matters of Islaam I need to get the fundamentals in full force. “A house can’t be built without pillars…”, he says. So I’m taking a step back to take a refresher course that will nurture my soul.
The new addition to the family will be 2 months soon, inshaallah. He is so beautiful, maa shaa’allah and he knows me!!!!! Lol. That’s the best part :) I have a bond with him that I can’t explain. I told my Co she needs a phone with a front facing camera so I can Tango him everyday (as if I won’t see him during the week! Lol)
We are growing spritually as a family and it’s one of the most beautiful experiences in the world. We are building a support system that at times may have glitches but nothing that the Speech of Allah and the Sunnah of His Messenger (sallahu alayhi was sallam) can’t fix…
Everything is Everything! Alhamdullillah.